Mid life crisis is perceived by many as an emotional period of doubt and anxiety sometimes experienced by people who realize that their life is already half over
Various obvious bodily and psychological changes are evident between the ages of 40 to. Carl Jung, a psychologist by profession was the first to identify it as a normal part of the maturing process. Most people will experience some form of emotional shift or transition during that time of life. A transition that might cause you to take stock of where you are in life and make some adjustments to the way you conduct your life. Most seem to come through the process smoothly without making major life changes. Midlife crisis for some may bring in complications and an emotional turmoil which may lead to depression and may need clinical attention.
Some people may experience a range of mid life crisis feelings such as:
- Boredom. They may loose interest in people and things which was not the case during their younger years.
- Sadness sets into life and activities which give them a high and happiness for many years may now seem distant.
- Confusion sets in as to who they are and where they are going
- Decision making will seem a tedious task now
- One will start questioning the choices, they have made in their lives and the validity of decision they made years back.
- For some a need for adventure and change will set in.
- Sometimes these crisis arise due to external factors. Factors aiding these crisis may be due to stress in ones life or some childhood issues that were never dealt or debts and retirement crisis which add up to the mid-life problems. Sometimes a death of a parent or family member can cause grief, which is difficult enough to come to terms with, as also having to cope with the feelings of a midlife shift. The loss combined with the mid-life crisis is just to bewildering and overwhelming. The other classic case of a mid-life crisis is an avoidant personality. Person with this trait will run away from the problems he comes across rather than facing it. He may just avoid getting into conflicts in his personal relationships, has feelings of inadequacy, is an emotionally distant personality with low self-esteem. He has deep fear of feeling of rejection and shame.
Now let me suggest some positive tips to overcome the feeling of mid-life crisis and turn back the clock. Many people see a mid-life crisis as a harmless event in an older man’s life. Maybe he starts counting his pennies and becomes stingy despite a good bank balance, or indulges in extravagance - for example buys a sports car, gets hair transplants, but it doesn’t usually progress past that. But the ultimate truth of such crisis can be a real family crisis, not to mention traumatic for the children involved.
Reinvent your marital relationship: Celebrating a few jubilees and it is only natural for couples to become detached, and they begin to drift apart emotionally. This is a type of setting that is a breeding ground for a midlife crisis. During this time, people should seek out new adventures, and do things together to reinvigorate their relationship.
Focus on positives instead of regrets and weakness.Many people who are going through a mid-life crisis find themselves depressed because of they could not achieve their goals they had set for themselves many years back. These people should focus instead on their strengths, and try to build off of them. For example, if an insurance agent having reached middle age feels trapped and unfulfilled, he should use his skill set to start his own business.
Get fit!The only sure-shot way to good health and erase boredom and depression is to get into the right eating habits and a generous helping of exercise routine daily. These habits not only extend the life span of an individual but also brings in feel-good factor in oneself.
Look forward instead of backwardsOne of the most common symptoms of mid-life crisis is longing for younger days and past loves. While it is normal to look back fondly on such events, it is not healthy to let these thoughts overcome current relationships. Individuals going through a midlife crisis are encouraged to make special plans for the future, and focus on all the amazing things that are still in the offing.
Increase your social circle Sometimes, people can find solace by talking to others from the age group or peer group. Speaking openly about their thoughts and feelings does not come naturally to all people, but doing so helps individuals in the midst of a midlife crisis feel less isolated and better about themselves.
Get counselingMidlife crisis treatment programs help such people and their families get through this difficult period. Counseling provides healthy solutions for the challenges that people in their 40’s and 50’s face every day.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Fasting and its benefits
It has been a universal concern now for everyone to stay fit and healthy, which cannot be missed out. After all, it is the matter of health and no one can afford to take risks with that. It is an accepted norm now – Health is Wealth. And where there is health, happiness is sure to prevail. Who would like to live with ailments? Who would want to spend their life by taking medicines all the time? Fitness sessions are the ultimate choice for those fitness freaks, who want to stay away from ailments. These days, the trend of being fit has started to such an extent that people in NYC have started preferring personal trainers for this purpose.
Many of our Indian Customs are followed in such a way that be it the garb of festival season or to please deities or pledging a month-long fast to God, if ones desires are met are some natural ways to fitness. Fasting in India has always been associated with religious sentiments and it is a sure-shot way for internal cleansing. It is said that one should refrain from eating once a week and carry on with a liquid diet. This enables a person to maintain a balanced mind and body control. It increases ones capability to live longer and fight diseases. Clear complexion, better immunity, balanced mind, clear thoughts are some of the other benefits of internal cleansing.
Fasting will teach you to control your urges, understand your will-power and this will aid in weight control. But 95% of people who start dieting give up and put on weight again. To succeed in healthy weight control, one must control one’s appetite. Let’s look how fasting can help loose weight. Across the globe religious preachers and books propagate fasting as one of the ways to control our urges and bring discipline in ones life. The effects of fasting technically commences within the first twelve to twenty-four hours of the fast. Results of fasting do not show until the carbohydrate stores in the body begin to be used as an energy source. The fast will continue as long as fat and carbohydrate stores are used for energy, as opposed to protein stores. Once protein stores begin to be depleted for energy (resulting in loss of muscle mass) a person is termed as starving.
Only when a body is deprived of food elements for some time, the benefits of fasting can be observed. Due to the lack of incoming energy, the body must turn to its own resources, a function called autolysis - breaking down of fat stores in the body in order to produce energy. The liver plays the role of converting the fats into a chemical called a ketone body, the metabolic substances acetoacetic acid and beta-hydroxybutyric acid and then distributing these substances throughout the body via the blood stream. When this fat utilization occurs, free fatty acids are released into the blood stream and are used by the liver for energy. The less one eats, the more the body turns to these stored fats and creates these ketone bodies, the accumulation of which is referred to as ketosis.
Detoxification is also one of the foremost reasons to observe fasting. Detoxification is a normal body process of eliminating toxins through the kidney, lungs, colon, liver, lymph glands, and skin. This process is precipitated by fasting because when food is no longer entering the body, the body turns to fat reserves for energy. The fat reserves were created when excess glucose and carbohydrates were not used for energy or growth, not excreted, and therefore converted into fat. When the fat reserves are used for energy during a fast, it releases the chemicals from the fatty acids into the system which are then eliminated. Chemicals not found in food but absorbed from one's environment, such as DDT, are also stored in fat reserves that may be released during a fast.
Finally, the most scientifically proven advantage to fasting is the feeling of rejuvenation and extended life expectancy. Part of this phenomenon is caused by a number of the benefits mentioned above. In 1930 a study was performed on earthworms to demonstrate extension of life during fasting. The isolated worm outlasted its relatives by 19 generations, while still maintaining its youthful physiological traits. The worm was able to survive on its own tissue for months. Once the size of the worm began to decrease, the scientists would start feeding it and at this point the worm showed great vigor and energy. The life-span extension of these worms was the equivalent of keeping a man alive for 6 generations.
In conclusion, it seems that there are many reasons to consider fasting as a benefit to one's health. The body rids itself of the toxins that have built up in our fat stores throughout the years. The body heals itself, repairs all the damaged organs during a fast. And finally there is good evidence to show that fasting at regular intervals contributes to longer life.
Many of our Indian Customs are followed in such a way that be it the garb of festival season or to please deities or pledging a month-long fast to God, if ones desires are met are some natural ways to fitness. Fasting in India has always been associated with religious sentiments and it is a sure-shot way for internal cleansing. It is said that one should refrain from eating once a week and carry on with a liquid diet. This enables a person to maintain a balanced mind and body control. It increases ones capability to live longer and fight diseases. Clear complexion, better immunity, balanced mind, clear thoughts are some of the other benefits of internal cleansing.
Fasting will teach you to control your urges, understand your will-power and this will aid in weight control. But 95% of people who start dieting give up and put on weight again. To succeed in healthy weight control, one must control one’s appetite. Let’s look how fasting can help loose weight. Across the globe religious preachers and books propagate fasting as one of the ways to control our urges and bring discipline in ones life. The effects of fasting technically commences within the first twelve to twenty-four hours of the fast. Results of fasting do not show until the carbohydrate stores in the body begin to be used as an energy source. The fast will continue as long as fat and carbohydrate stores are used for energy, as opposed to protein stores. Once protein stores begin to be depleted for energy (resulting in loss of muscle mass) a person is termed as starving.
Only when a body is deprived of food elements for some time, the benefits of fasting can be observed. Due to the lack of incoming energy, the body must turn to its own resources, a function called autolysis - breaking down of fat stores in the body in order to produce energy. The liver plays the role of converting the fats into a chemical called a ketone body, the metabolic substances acetoacetic acid and beta-hydroxybutyric acid and then distributing these substances throughout the body via the blood stream. When this fat utilization occurs, free fatty acids are released into the blood stream and are used by the liver for energy. The less one eats, the more the body turns to these stored fats and creates these ketone bodies, the accumulation of which is referred to as ketosis.
Detoxification is also one of the foremost reasons to observe fasting. Detoxification is a normal body process of eliminating toxins through the kidney, lungs, colon, liver, lymph glands, and skin. This process is precipitated by fasting because when food is no longer entering the body, the body turns to fat reserves for energy. The fat reserves were created when excess glucose and carbohydrates were not used for energy or growth, not excreted, and therefore converted into fat. When the fat reserves are used for energy during a fast, it releases the chemicals from the fatty acids into the system which are then eliminated. Chemicals not found in food but absorbed from one's environment, such as DDT, are also stored in fat reserves that may be released during a fast.
Finally, the most scientifically proven advantage to fasting is the feeling of rejuvenation and extended life expectancy. Part of this phenomenon is caused by a number of the benefits mentioned above. In 1930 a study was performed on earthworms to demonstrate extension of life during fasting. The isolated worm outlasted its relatives by 19 generations, while still maintaining its youthful physiological traits. The worm was able to survive on its own tissue for months. Once the size of the worm began to decrease, the scientists would start feeding it and at this point the worm showed great vigor and energy. The life-span extension of these worms was the equivalent of keeping a man alive for 6 generations.
In conclusion, it seems that there are many reasons to consider fasting as a benefit to one's health. The body rids itself of the toxins that have built up in our fat stores throughout the years. The body heals itself, repairs all the damaged organs during a fast. And finally there is good evidence to show that fasting at regular intervals contributes to longer life.
Monday, December 21, 2009
Happiness at the work-place
Happiness at workplace is a relative term – Different for different people – but one common factor which binds all working class people is – they all crave to be happy in what they do - Of course, with jobs getting more and more demanding these days, we often ignore the ways in finding happiness in the workplace and this can even put a toll on your health.
Its been 18 long years since I first started working and earning my livelihood has never been a forced chore on me – never – it has given me immense happiness and a state of contentment – there have been ups and downs during my stints in various organizations and there have been pitfalls many a times when hard work did not get recognized, when gratitude took a back seat and someone stole the credit for all the good work done by me – God bless them all.
When I look back and take a stock of what I have achieved after 18 years of hard work, 18 long years of commuting to and fro workplace, then happily take control of my kitchen once back from work, prepare myself for the next day session, spend time with family and spread cheer and happiness in their lives – I feel I have been a far cry from being a ‘cribber’. Playing various roles in ones life as also balancing it out well has always been my forte. I have never cribbed – not at office, not at home – I can say this confidently that I have attained ‘happiness’ from being the woman of substance. Work life balance is a relative term and is defined differently by different people. Come Friday and work life balance is at its optimum. For my child – “mamma, tell your boss to give you paid leave on Monday as well”, for my husband – “thank god its’ Friday – lets plan for a good weekend, for my lovely in-laws its been like “now take care you’re your little devil (my 9 year old sweet little brat), for my friends – hey lets have a party… and so and so forth.
Spending 12 – 14 hours a day away from home, working hard to earn our livelihood does compel a person to conduct ones’ life in a controlled way – its’ essential, it’s a written law – one has to respect the decorum of the office, one has to respect the values laid down by one’s organization for which one has been working for – as ultimately your bread and butter and of course your 4 course meal does come from it.
One has been extremely dedicated to ones workplace – Rule number one. Rule number two – be dedicated to your workplace and rule number three – be dedicated to your workplace…. Umph, uh-ump!" so there… you must be chuckling your heart out fellas! All this and many more organizational values should not bog you down. Every Company may have its own set of rules and values. Just abiding by it does not in anyway deprive your of your happiness. Do not feel like a bonded labourer. Understand that it’s a mutual give and take relationship. Work honestly hard and get paid for it.. Pink-slips, attritions, salary-cuts are part and parcel of present day organizations. But ‘to be’ or ‘not to be’ – happy - is finally for you to decide.
Some tips to be happy workplace pal and cheer-spreader :
- Come to office with a cheerful smile and spread cheers around your workplace. Spend the first 15 minutes greeting your work pals and get connected with them – very essential if you want your day to end happy as well. Think about happy thoughts and think about feeling good. The power of the mind is a major factor in our disposition in life.
- Cultivate effective work habits. Take a break from work every hour, just take a walk, probably to the wash-room, or just a stroll to your office canteen and sample out the many dishes rolled out for the noon. This will ease out your stress built around you when constantly glued to your computer or a serious day long office meeting. Sometimes we tend to forget about being happy in the workplace because we are too preoccupied with the many things that we still have to achieve, the unfinished tasks and backlogs we have to take care of, and the many errands to run. By being too busy all the time that you can't even enjoy a good meal can lead you to be a burnt-out man. Manage your time and learn to delegate. Avoid procrastination as well. Effective work habits also allow you to have time to rest and develop good friendships with your co-workers as well.
- Always associate with positive work pals. These are your greatest moral boosters as also stress busters. Have chat sessions during lunch hours, share some office jokes and have hearty laughs and spread cheer around you. It is said – whatever you give, comes back to you in bundles – Is it not – I am sure you will agree.
- Get a good exercise before or after work. Getting a good physical activity and exercise helps you a lot in feeling good and great in the workplace. It will not only put you in good mood but it will also help you avoid feeling tired and bored and help you overcome stress at work as well. Of course, feeling good and healthy helps a lot in being happy everyday and in finding happiness in the workplace and in anywhere you go.
So what are you waiting for – Go Get It – Don’t Worry Be Happy -
Its been 18 long years since I first started working and earning my livelihood has never been a forced chore on me – never – it has given me immense happiness and a state of contentment – there have been ups and downs during my stints in various organizations and there have been pitfalls many a times when hard work did not get recognized, when gratitude took a back seat and someone stole the credit for all the good work done by me – God bless them all.
When I look back and take a stock of what I have achieved after 18 years of hard work, 18 long years of commuting to and fro workplace, then happily take control of my kitchen once back from work, prepare myself for the next day session, spend time with family and spread cheer and happiness in their lives – I feel I have been a far cry from being a ‘cribber’. Playing various roles in ones life as also balancing it out well has always been my forte. I have never cribbed – not at office, not at home – I can say this confidently that I have attained ‘happiness’ from being the woman of substance. Work life balance is a relative term and is defined differently by different people. Come Friday and work life balance is at its optimum. For my child – “mamma, tell your boss to give you paid leave on Monday as well”, for my husband – “thank god its’ Friday – lets plan for a good weekend, for my lovely in-laws its been like “now take care you’re your little devil (my 9 year old sweet little brat), for my friends – hey lets have a party… and so and so forth.
Spending 12 – 14 hours a day away from home, working hard to earn our livelihood does compel a person to conduct ones’ life in a controlled way – its’ essential, it’s a written law – one has to respect the decorum of the office, one has to respect the values laid down by one’s organization for which one has been working for – as ultimately your bread and butter and of course your 4 course meal does come from it.
One has been extremely dedicated to ones workplace – Rule number one. Rule number two – be dedicated to your workplace and rule number three – be dedicated to your workplace…. Umph, uh-ump!" so there… you must be chuckling your heart out fellas! All this and many more organizational values should not bog you down. Every Company may have its own set of rules and values. Just abiding by it does not in anyway deprive your of your happiness. Do not feel like a bonded labourer. Understand that it’s a mutual give and take relationship. Work honestly hard and get paid for it.. Pink-slips, attritions, salary-cuts are part and parcel of present day organizations. But ‘to be’ or ‘not to be’ – happy - is finally for you to decide.
Some tips to be happy workplace pal and cheer-spreader :
- Come to office with a cheerful smile and spread cheers around your workplace. Spend the first 15 minutes greeting your work pals and get connected with them – very essential if you want your day to end happy as well. Think about happy thoughts and think about feeling good. The power of the mind is a major factor in our disposition in life.
- Cultivate effective work habits. Take a break from work every hour, just take a walk, probably to the wash-room, or just a stroll to your office canteen and sample out the many dishes rolled out for the noon. This will ease out your stress built around you when constantly glued to your computer or a serious day long office meeting. Sometimes we tend to forget about being happy in the workplace because we are too preoccupied with the many things that we still have to achieve, the unfinished tasks and backlogs we have to take care of, and the many errands to run. By being too busy all the time that you can't even enjoy a good meal can lead you to be a burnt-out man. Manage your time and learn to delegate. Avoid procrastination as well. Effective work habits also allow you to have time to rest and develop good friendships with your co-workers as well.
- Always associate with positive work pals. These are your greatest moral boosters as also stress busters. Have chat sessions during lunch hours, share some office jokes and have hearty laughs and spread cheer around you. It is said – whatever you give, comes back to you in bundles – Is it not – I am sure you will agree.
- Get a good exercise before or after work. Getting a good physical activity and exercise helps you a lot in feeling good and great in the workplace. It will not only put you in good mood but it will also help you avoid feeling tired and bored and help you overcome stress at work as well. Of course, feeling good and healthy helps a lot in being happy everyday and in finding happiness in the workplace and in anywhere you go.
So what are you waiting for – Go Get It – Don’t Worry Be Happy -
Know where your happiness is .. go get it!
Happiness can be attributed to quite a few traits and habits in people which stands out from rest of the crowd. One can attribute it to relationships, marital bliss, health, optimism, spiritualism, financial background and your circle of happy-go-lucky people around you. Also, the structure of social network has an impact on ones happiness, as people who are outgoing and have friends, who match up with your idealism are more likely to be happy.
One may seek happiness in the reaching out to others – Mother Teresa, the ultimate soul depicting the highest ranking in terms of ‘happiness’. Not everyone can be like her but reaching out to others in one’s time of need is the true source of attaining Nirvana and Nirvana is the ethereal truth of happiness. Some are happy people when they are in total control, that is, when they feel competent to achieve their goals and satisfy their needs. Others may find solace in making ‘moolah’ – money and may not follow all the rules of the book which compliment happiness.
Thru the eyes of a high school graduate aiming to reach the pinnacle of success may see Mukesh Ambani, Ratan Tata, Azim Premji, Laxmi Mittal, Bill Gates, Richard Branson as the ultimate happiness seekers. For them to be happy is to set tough goals and work around those goals which will provide them with name, fame and prosperity – so much so that they will be discussed as case studies in Management schools. This is ‘happiness’ for a school graduate. I am sure you all will agree with me – the new young generation!
So what are you waiting for. Happiness for all you people out there is right around the corner. Don’t just wait – Go Get It!
Be passionate in whatever you do and I am sure you will Get It…..
One may seek happiness in the reaching out to others – Mother Teresa, the ultimate soul depicting the highest ranking in terms of ‘happiness’. Not everyone can be like her but reaching out to others in one’s time of need is the true source of attaining Nirvana and Nirvana is the ethereal truth of happiness. Some are happy people when they are in total control, that is, when they feel competent to achieve their goals and satisfy their needs. Others may find solace in making ‘moolah’ – money and may not follow all the rules of the book which compliment happiness.
Thru the eyes of a high school graduate aiming to reach the pinnacle of success may see Mukesh Ambani, Ratan Tata, Azim Premji, Laxmi Mittal, Bill Gates, Richard Branson as the ultimate happiness seekers. For them to be happy is to set tough goals and work around those goals which will provide them with name, fame and prosperity – so much so that they will be discussed as case studies in Management schools. This is ‘happiness’ for a school graduate. I am sure you all will agree with me – the new young generation!
So what are you waiting for. Happiness for all you people out there is right around the corner. Don’t just wait – Go Get It!
Be passionate in whatever you do and I am sure you will Get It…..
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Happiness for ever
Every individual has his/her definition of Happiness. For a stray dog, to win over the stale piece of meat from the garbage bin might be his eternal state of happiness. For a beggar to get a dollar from a kind man will make his day and this thought will provide him happiness for a long time. For a saint it’s the meditative mind which is his reason for showing contentment and a child is sure to be happy with a close hug from her parents. I am no different from any of this specimen.
Being part of this materialistic world I have learnt to balance my energies both negative and positive, so as to say, by reaching out to the creator of this world - this I religiously do getting into a meditative state of mind for at least 15 minutes a day, which I feel gives me the rejuvenation I need, the spiritual awakening I crave for after a hard days work.
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